i feel guilty for kissing another guy

I agree. As for what we believe about kissing being the gateway to sex (specifically foreplay, which itself is the main gate): if anyone believes it *isn't*, thenwellAll I could say to that is: California coastal beeches will leave you saying -America not too shabby.. Can't take anything from South of France-doesn't everybody go there? I've never gone to a counsellor before, but I'm going to see one next week to talk through it. I could tell that he had a thing for you. No matter how much we insist that "it's all good, bro, we're like, totally homies!", we don't mean it, not really. Buster was in law school Buster Murdaugh, left, and his girlfriend Brooklynn White watch a video clip from Buster's brother Paul's phone in the double murder trial of Alex Murdaugh at the Colleton . By having a relationship with someone else and then just disappearing off it made things so much more complex for me, him and particularly the DC. DON'T: Kiss and tell to someone you're kissing. Why don't I feel guilty for kissing another guy? - Quora reader, anonymous, writes (25 October 2005): A (Sorry you got cheated on. Again I could go on with this subject,and I undoubtedly will. WORK. By accepting all cookies, you agree to our use of cookies to deliver and maintain our services and site, improve the quality of Reddit, personalize Reddit content and advertising, and measure the effectiveness of advertising. Yes, that's what I was going to advise - that you two continue any discussion on LG's own thread. Kissing After Divorce: Can You Handle It? - Divorced Girl Smiling I have to admit that by kissing this guy whom I liked, I did cheat on my husband. Well you need to figure that out and fast. It really depends on the dynamics of your relationship though. Tl;dr: why do I feel guilty after ending things with a guy who grabbed my ass during our first kiss? Thank you. Houston, well, whaddayaknow - I'M PREGNANT! I just knew you would cheat on me if given half a chance.. But, I did find out that I was attracted to my piano teacher. Anyway, I just thought I'd mention it out of respect for that other time with that girl and to show you that, despite I'm not as quick thinking as you, especially when I'm blotto, I can still handle myself in these situations [grin]." Even despite it included you having to become whatever degree of a low-down doity adulterer. In the end you're the one who knows your boyfriend and whether he would like to know about something like that or not. The caller wasn't experienced (like me). Changing jobs or departments and without delay, those things that aren't rocket science, is definitely what I as a fractionally betrayed partner would call you putting your rueful money where your rueful mouth is - enough to help reassure permanently. I reassured my husband that this would never happen again and that I was sorry. Do you want to end you marriage? Simone was telling a caller how satisfy his girlfriend. I hadn't been out drinking for about 3 months beforehand, so think the excitement of the night, constant glasses prosecco and wine, and the buzz of just being all dolled up all mixed together to see me very giddy and tipsy. Plus, I *was* moreover affronted, meaning the guy got off lightly, because [1] I hadn't even caught his eye, [2] my wedding band is very thick thus too noticeable even from a distance, meaning his chat-up attempt was both un-instigated and unwanted, so [3] what sort of person did he think I WAS, just from looking at me?! Such as crying,begging that would be enough for me to give them a second chance. I recall an incident years ago, we were very young, just teenagers, and a girl planted a big kiss on my hubby (then boyfriend) on a night out. (*'I know, your right, it's just I'm really attracted to you and couldn't not act on it, I'm sorry, you're right'. I'm taking it day by day. I am biased and do hold strong views because my XH cheated. Later, he tried to make out and I said no because I felt it was wrong.I told him I needed a uber. But not good enough and you not happy enough to exclude fore-foreplay (open-mouthed kissing) with someone (*ugh) other than him as per the for-life contract? 8=) ) View related questions: I made it explicit to my girlfriend that I can only function in an extremely honest and all-cards-on-the-table relationship. He also sent me a mean text that said for me to go f myself and to stay away from him. Hello, TheBestAdvice: Im glad you thought my post was intelligent and that you could relate to it. HIKARI, you can't take up an obsolete thread as your own, no matter any similarities, so if you want feedback and advice it's best to start a new one (and copy and paste that post into it as your opening post), okay? :-)), SOULMATE: Meant as in the universe of sisterhood (wrongly) To award Biggest B*lls on the Block Award -comment never was to imply same race- so on behalf of the Academy I accept :), (Good stuff. Boyfriend kissed another guy at a gay bar with me for my fantasy, i 07/12/2015 22:05. Before you close I'd like to say that I totally agree with you. You kissed a guy - Possibly unforgivable. male I was enjoying myself and loving the chats and laughs. So if for some reason he'd got funny about it, I'd have just dealt with it. Now is that thread on this site (people's problems)? With the other woman just across the room! If, on the other hand, you kissed someone whom you knew or someone your significant other believes youve always liked, and then you confess that you kissed him or her, your actions could have major consequences for your relationship Why? Sorry Soulmate I know I need to stop,but it's hard to. If I were the husband and some how found out through a second party my trust would be broken. reader, anonymous, writes (11 September 2007): A The doubt in your mind over his behaviour might actually be a doubt in your mind over yours. What isn't, is He went on to tell me that he kissed another woman and he had to tell me, he couldn't keep it a secret from me. It was a real dress up affair, and the drink flowed freely all night long. It ended up leading to a follow-up video of straight girls kissing other girls for the first time. It's quick, easy, free and you don't have to leave your real name. Married and I kissed another manshould I tell him? - Page 2 This should be obvious, but sadly, for many it's not. When you're in a long-term relationship, it's normal to have a little crush on someone other than your partner. We've been together a lot of today for various reasons, we've talked a little but as of right now, officially I'm still "thinking things over." Despite their passion during the kiss though, thestraight guys (quite predictably)all saythey still identified asstraight. I knew this was wrong but my brain wasn't working properly. Wouldn't you? What should I do. His imagination could go haywire over that one. If you think that straight guys are too macho to experiment with same-sex kissing, then yourewrong. Alcohol was a factor, but all it did was bring to the surface the feelings that were already there. [2] ..you showed you don't think of he and you as a team by sharing all information pertinent to the relationship; I agree with Vale that the best thing you can do is talk to Cintia about what happened and tell her that seeing her kissing Mercy upset you. ;-D. Ahhhh you're back! Add your answer to this question! I didnt hear from my piano teacher for at least two weeks after that. I certainly took full responsibility for my actions, and fortunately the guy I kissed also took responsibility for his actions. But, again, it's never what you do, it's the way that you do it, meaning I was careful to be sensitive in the telling. Arun, I agree with everything you said here because I was guilty of kissing a guy I liked when I was drunk, knowing that I liked him and wanted to see how much.". I've gone to a couple thread's here recently. Tico Franklin, now 40, faced the death . She confessed to loving the experience and enjoyed the thrill knowing she had her husbands permission and he was watching her. When I woke up yesterday I still felt drunk but the reality of what happened hit me like a tonne of bricks. Years after my divorce the one thing that still makes me really angry is that my XH should have ended the marriage as thats what he wanted. "I'm not sure if you are trying to be helpful, or just entertaining yourself with your responses." I believe that its a good thing to fess up when kissing someone you care about when you drank too much could threaten your existing relationship. If it were me, I would contact her, & let her know that I didn't appreciate her actions. Most people don't confess- You ask for advice of what you should do- you got the RIGHT advice. You confessed your sins. Not Opening Up To You Anymore At least I understood why our marriage failed and no further closure was needed. Hi SoulMate! Generally people dont care when it happens with others but when it happens with them, they may react very differently because human are emotional creatures. Here are the frightening ways to know that he gave another girl a kiss ; 1. I could go on about a lot of things here. For starters, your husband, even when supposedly immature, didn't kiss HER. I am 100% sure he will forgive you and will love you even more for telling him (which you should have done A LONG TIME AGO). I am the same way. Whoever did it, doesnt matter. Anon Pink, 20 ways to speak Love & Admiration to our husbands. he said the situations arent at all the same bc he doesnt feel turned on by me kissing another guy the way i do from a male on male kiss. It's where the lips have been and where they're going. There was a line that was crossed when they kissed, he should no longer have her as a Facebook friend, or any other communication with her. I told him straight away what had happened. Perhaps this one is geared more toward the ladies, but I feel pretty confident in assuming that no matter the . He deserves the right to make the decision on whether he can forgive you and move on with you. I'd never be able to get over it. I certainly wouldnt throw him under the bus -just yet. And now you - who finds trust difficult - have been tempted to do your OWN test (already commencedwhilst drunk), approached via the psychological end. I see this as two issues. [1] you didn't foresee and avoid being in that predicament. | I believe, on the other hand, that if you got drunk and kissed someone because you were drunk and you had no feelings for the other person, there is no point in confessing about that kiss because a confession could cause trouble over nothing. He doesn't deserve to be hurt by this. She may say that. PostedNovember 9, 2014 My husband wasnt home at the time. Im also pleased that you agreed with my argument as to when to fess up and when to keep your mouth shut. But I don't see the need to borrow trouble by telling your boyfriend if you have learned your lesson and know you will never do . i agree with everyone there's some really good sharing here. Are you sure all you did was kiss? Take action instead of ruminating in guilt. I know he would forgive me but I don't want to deal with issue with him. It takes to heal the wounded trust again. Therefore, you might be surprised to learn the following facts about guilt: What can you do to address unresolved guilt? Your punishment is living with this. Should I tell him I kissed someone else? - by John Grey, PhD Go to a therapist if you think it could help you work through why this has appealed so much. I wish I told my wife, but she found out because in my browsing history I had searched should I tell my wife I kissed a girl when drunk. I worry I made huge mistakes in my life and that I am destined to life a "good" family life forever more, but never feel that amazing desire and lust and sexual attraction I don't feel for anyone else but this man. I dont believe in innocent kiss. I love your stories, Foxie. What if your husband ever found out? I feel like I like myself down and my husband down. Make it up to him by being an awesome girlfriend. I kissed another man four years ago. Guilt is a common feeling of emotional distress that signals us when our actions or inactions have caused or might cause harm to another personphysical, emotional, or otherwise. You had too much to drink and you kissed someone who wasnt your boyfriend or your girlfriend. No, you don't. SA you have got it- it is more the "what's behind it" than what happened. But fine, then 'It's not what you do, it's the way that you do it': give him the truth *cleverly*. I'm dating this guy and have been for about 2 months. I feel like my husband deserves so much better, but can't tell him because the guy isn't some stranger, he's a person I see 5 days a week, and I know if tables were turned and I was in my husbands position I would wonder what interactions were happening between the two in work everyday. So she left after a couple of replies. That is what separates the women from the girls. Being drunk is never a "reason" for cheating. "Sadly, many people who have a crush on someone else purposely get drunk ". Thus it's what I *DID DO* - back in September when at an Indian restaurant with friends (I mentioned it on this forum as apropos to someone's thread) and some bloke tried to come onto me. Confide in someone you trust. If you want to know the why's, you're going to have to be willing to hear the darkest part of what makes me, ME. And then continued behaving like friends as if the mere certificate would do the work and promotion parts for you (or, alternatively, continued accepting the fact that ONE friend couldn't quite dare up his friendship ante to where you felt sated in the affection and attention worthy of marriage department) ;-)) I did say gateway to sex at first didn't I. PS: Don't ever drop it, will you. Things do get out of our hand at times, now think. I waited for the right time ?? But I can't leave my job. Mattia Insolia, Cieli in fiamme (Mondadori) con Valentina Berengo Because telling him something that you regret and will never do again is doing exactly that. Then the accusations begin, which night go something like: Why on earth did you kiss _________? New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast. Press J to jump to the feed. So this was me subconsciously- not *setting* the standard but showing my maintaining it as per our agreements over only having eyes for each other and always, ALWAYS being 100% honest with each other no matter WHAT. You knowing you can trust your husband to do the right thing when faced with temptation is all it takes for him to remain blight-free when blight (whether or not wearing fishnets) threatens. Just trying to keep the pot stirred,the fire burning. What if they were married? There's nothing wrong with feeling an attraction to another person when you're in a relationship. She may mean it now, but maybe next week she wont, but you cannot rely on it..Is it a pattern of distrust? People who are qualified to label themselves good don't keep secrets from the one person in the world they tacitly vowed never to keep secrets from, particularly when the information is the victim's right to know (in order to continue to emotionally protect themselves, particularly whenever their partner's showing they're currently unable to execute their duty of helping them do so 'right to know' because where there's a problem in the relationship as, with the mere aid of the pigpen gate-unlocker called alcohol, causes behaviour counter to the relationship's chances of continued success, then - AS a team - it takes both members' addressing it together for the solution/outcome to possess any real authenticity or permanent efficacy. We were good friends for a few years and have dated in the past but nothing serious. You even said it indirectly in your story, when said you decided to get drunk. (PS: These 'recent issues' of yours. Your significant other might get very angry about this, but I believe it depends more on whom you kissed rather than on the fact that you kissed someone else. One day, he came over with a bottle of whisky and he had already been drinking. My eyes were closed and my head was spinning. Dont tell me now that youre in love with him.. Similarly, meeting with someone privately and not telling your partner can also be a warning sign that . Assistir Chelsea X Leeds - Ao Vivo Grtis HD sem travar, sem anncios. The next time you saw your significant other you might have blurted out, I have a confession to make. I speak from experience when I say that when that intimacy starts to die, it can be the start of the end. How To Cope With Guilt When You Hurt Someone In A Relationship Or does it mean something bigger in terms of my own relationship? Ive told her Im sorry, I wont let it happen again and Im sorry for being dishonest. Houston, we have a problem. And note, you don't HAVE to take my advice. I rang the guy and said ' oh wow, so last night, that really happened, what the hell where we at? ' That's what it takes to have a Grade A romance that never dies. The drunk part won't matter to him because his mind will only think about the kiss. What am I going to do? This recently happened to me. Loyal Girl sorry to hear about your situation. Hang on because I'm sure there will be other people who believe differently from me. What should I do. I've been cheated on just recently and I cannot imagine how awful it would be if he didn't own up and tell me. Funny, I have never gotten amorous when I have had too much to drink. It was important to hear the argument for doing what is right. I guess it's the nature of the topic - emotive yet one of those Grey areas. They need to hold people more accountable to commitment. He never says this so I knew it was something serious. It's just a "good weekend?" It didn't feel real. If he wants to keep her as a "friend", complete access is a must. Ill bet you got drunk on purpose because you wanted to kiss him/her.. We finally mended fences, but there still is a type of tension between us. I'll inform the vicar, you cancel the cake, yeh? Is kissing someone else when drunk cheating? And he kissed me and I reciprocated. I was heart broken, and even though he said he immediately pulled away, and we stayed together and over time forgot about it, I remember feeling so uneasy every time I knew he would be in that girls company. He kissed another woman | Talk About Marriage If you both agreed not to see anyone else, how is that not exclusive? I felt disorientated. Alcohol does not change that fact. When Having A Crush While In A Relationship Is OK (And When - HuffPost Which probably makes you wonder why I came here in the first place. An affair isn't a bad choice made when a married person decides to sleep with someone that they aren't married to. My SO and I had been dating two years. If you are carrying so much guilt, it's generally a sign that you care a lot about someone and you are really sorry for what you have done- perhaps he realises this. I am deeply shocked this has happened and I don't know who to turn to for help. Mercy got too drunk, Cintia was drunk but she was ok so far. You can even introduce is as you 'having something to tell him that you're very proud of yourself over and wholly expect will make him proud of you too'..such as: Is Kissing Someone When Drunk Cheating? | Relationship Talk Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. I recently broke up with my boyfriend of 6 months and I feel so guilty. BTW lips are also very much a part of foreplay that's what I've read. Should I tell him or just get on with my life and put this whole sorry mess behind me? However, if you kissed someone whom you liked or had a crush on while you were drunk, my opinion is that you cheated. Unforeseeable consequence. (As you were), It happened to me,too last Jan.31,2016, and it happened again in the following days. I think it is a better idea for both of you good luck.do share progress. My opinion, fwiw, is that what you did was not that bad. All night I chatted and joked with a group of maybe 10 people, mostly women. Don't feel guilty because you are a mom (or dad) and you feel like you need to be spending time with them. And as for our original subject, who knows maybe she told him. Not work you put off until 'tomorrow' - TODAY. I had had an argument with my fianc because I found a suspicious text from a woman , he became very mad . lover. Maybe you didnt deliberately set out to kiss him or her, but you feel guilty about the kiss because you realize you always wanted to kiss that person, but were afraid to kiss because you harbored hidden feelings for that person. Should find time to respond tomorrow. Lol For what possible reason? But we can get through it together if you are truley remoreseful. So it looks as if we're suddenly at crossed-purposes, then. Be the adult here. As time elapsed, I realized that I was attracted to him and this began to concern me. Psychology Today 2023 Sussex Publishers, LLC, Psychology and the Mystery of the "Poisoned" Schoolgirls. A Please leave me a comment. It's South of France for us this year, holiday-wise, and then in about a year-and-a-half's time we're off permanently to Espana (por favor). You werent totally bombed out of your mind, so you realized what you did and you felt guilty about it. ;-) Period. Though somehow I think there might have been trouble in the marriage. I tried to flag down a taxi but it ignored me and I even hid behind a wall at a garage while he took a pee. FoxieLadie is I came home and we resolved it and ever since everything has been fine. I am heartbroken but told him I understand that I couldnt be with someone who doesnt trust me. Thank you soulmate,but I'm getting over those issues. This. Scopes: Yes, the kids are the real victims. I guess what really bothers me a lot is when kids get involved. You're the worst! What if she sabotages the relationship through guilt? I cant trust you anymore., You think that having too much to drink made it all right for you to kiss ______? Spoiler alert: Not that different from kissing a girl, only they dont fancy them. I felt disorientated. When we got there the drinks flowed again , and more laughter and story telling. I was the driver so I did not drink at all just the wto girls. Translation: Stuff moral taboos, my wanton self-gratification urge is more important than any implement for world peacebut I'm a nice guy, no, really I am.) Well, now, that little lot *definitely* counts as 'debate fodder' relevant to this whole issue, rather than pure chit-chat. We stayed chatting for another 15 minutes or so, mostly apologising to one another and saying stuff like 'this isn't me, I don't do this' and 'what came over us? I was very drunk. Sometimes it doesnt help to tell your partner everything. I dont want him to be thinking that I am a cheat. Even if it is innocent kiss, I am done. This guy wouldnt take money from me (I should have seen this as a Red Flag, but didnt), so I bought him opera scores in order to compensate him for his time and expertise. Either way, I've noted your comments, I've already decided what I am going to do, and I'll deal with the consequences, whatever they might be. This is the decission you need to make do you want to risk all (career, home, kids as well as your DH) and be in a position you can pursue a relationship with this married man - who may well reject you for more than a fling. We all should know by now that alcohol affects our judgment and that it can make us less inhibited and cause us to behave in ways in which we never would behave while sober. I think a real man actually kisses a dude at least once to really know your sexuality, one says. .Houston, you and I have now strengthened our bond (whereby attention and affection follow) by together having conquered a potential crisis which can now longer be called a problem rather than a PAST godsend of a dual warning (not enough attention/affection worthy of marriage) merely in problematic clothing. I'm not condoning what I've done, and it's a totally different set of circumstances, but I remember wishing I had never known about the stupid kiss, as it tainted things for a while afterward. And the tricky piece de resistance It is the gateway to another feeling. This one by far has lasted the longest. Because you feel guilt and awful, that is already a potential secret wall that will build up between you and the one person in the world with whom you want to be a true closest friend. Stories about open relationships, swinging, polyamory and other alternative relationship structures. I think you already knew what you wanted to do, your husband was not home, saw an opportunity, and wanted to use being drunk as a cover story. Yes it hurts.. Any advice guys? reader, anonymous, writes (19 August 2006): A Just my opinion. The guilt may be strong because you doubt yourself right now and were surprised by your actions. Because guilt typically occurs in "micro-bursts" of brief signals, we often underestimate the rather significant role it plays in our daily lives. [4] WHY would you have kept it secret? Dont tell me that you and ______ (the girl who was staying at our house for the weekend) are lesbians? Cell phones, texting, emails etc. So if your planting includes a blight (guilty secret), please don't moan if it affects the crop yield. Helping ppl have the sex life they truly want thru writing & education. We kissed for maybe 5 minutes, or maybe less, I don't know. Okay. I was very drunk. I've noticed that other threads here haven't lasted very long. Whoops. He left and went to the lake. When the night was over one of the women said we could go back to hers for drinks, and I was happy to go. 2. LGBTYouTube stars Bria Kam and Chrissy Chambers (BriaAndChrissy) have released a videoexploring what its like for straight guys to kiss other men for the first time.